Today's Air Safety Announcement

Things you didn't know that will prepare you for things you may find yourself needing to do:

Hey guys, there's a way to open those lavatory doors on an airplane. There's usually a small metal plate underneath the "locked" sign. You can lift it up, and there is a latch underneath. Slide it over. Then open the door. Have a cup of hot coffee in your hand, that you just got from the galley. If he's doing nothing bad, say "excuse me". If he IS up to no good, throw the hot coffee in his face, and scream TERRORIST! HELP!

Do this if some of these middle east goons are on your flight making synchronistic hand-signals and going to the lavs together and staying in there a long time.

No one else is going to save your lives. There's not air marshalls on every flight.

THAT will teach THEM a lesson.

Good practical advice...