"(2006-09-08) — Top Senate Democrats, outraged over inaccuracies in the upcoming ABC mini-series The Path to 9/11, today said that in addition to yanking the network’s broadcast license, if the show airs Democrats might also withhold from ABC News the daily distribution of Democrat talking points.

A spokesman for Disney-owned ABC News said that while the network could weather the revocation of its broadcast license, thanks to the proliferation of cable and satellite TV, the loss of the Democrat talking points would force the news division to hire dozens of new reporters to fill the void in its newscasts.

Meanwhile, Scholastic Inc. recalled a Path to 9/11 study guide which it had offered to 25,000 high school teachers nationwide, and replaced it with “a more balanced, traditional teaching tool” prepared by MoveOn.org with help from Oscar-winning filmmaker Michael Moore.

In related news, a spokesman for former President Bill Clinton demanded significant cuts to an upcoming DVD release of Snow White to “eliminate factual errors and scenes of dwarf behavior clearly intended to smear the former president’s administration.” [ I can't top this so here's all of Scrappleface today. -ed. ] "