April 20, 2008 | This morning at the Coffee Bean, I spotted a bottle of water in the display case that had the words "Fat Free" written in a huge font on the label. Yes, there's no doubt about it now. We are truly a nation in decline.
I remember when bottled water really started to take off, it worried me that water labels said things like "The Thirst Quencher!" or "Nature's Best Hydrator!" Now we know that our cultural downward slide is almost complete.
"Hey, look, guys, let's not forget to remind people that there's no fat in water!" "Yes, because ... there's only water in water." "Right. In fact, maybe we should put 'Low sodium' and 'No sugar!' and 'Wheat-free' and 'Lactose-free' on there, too." "Definitely! Consumers need to understand that water is the most robust, scalable solution to the ongoing challenge of thirst."
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