In my six years of middle and high schools, I never once attended a club, a dance, a meeting, or any other after school activity. My best friend Jean and I would hightail it out of there as soon as the last bell rang.
You might think my school experience is unusual. Sadly, it's not. Innumerable people attended schools that were racial minefields.
It wasn't the black or the white kids' fault. High minded liberals were culpable for hatching up grand plans without an iota of thought about how it would play out in real time: that if you create a nightmare situation for black children by removing them from their neighborhood and their friends, you traumatize them. And if you then turn them loose and give them carte blanche, some will be out for blood.
To understand how people can shame each other, I want to introduce you to a defense mechanism, called projective identification.
PI is like a hot potato. The other person takes their bad feelings and dumps it directly on your lap.